So today I stumbled upon an article from 2015 being shared among my Facebook “friends.”

Alex Proud, the author of this controversial article, sounds like a drug addicted journalist (even though his “articles” look more like personal blog posts). “Ok,” I think to myself, “he has an addiction problem and is trying to make it look cool on the internet, whatever.”

There is, however, an army of (old) sheep on Facebook, who take this article literally and apply it to their own lives, like, “Yeah! Never too old to party!” but we’ll get to this later. First, let’s dissect Proud’s post titled, “Is it OK for a man to keep partying in his 40s and 50s?”

I’m not suggesting we live like Keith Richards or Jack Nicholson, but then you think a few beers, the odd spliff, a few glasses of wine and, oh, you just remembered that wrap of coke in your wallet … it doesn’t sound that bad, does it?

It actually sounds terrible. Beer, spliff, wine and coke is a problem whether you’re 19 or 55. An addiction problem.

And that’s before I consider the sheer and utter boredom of living with my sober self for another 40 years. I mean, I know drug stories can sometimes be boring. But exercise stories are always boring.

We’re getting somewhere – the author admits, in a self-diss, that he can’t stand himself sober. Any good psychologist can tell you that self-dissing humour is actually a form of self-hatred. I think we’re getting to the root of the problem here. If you read between the lines, you can see that the author is saying, “If you hate yourself and what you’ve become over the years, drink and do drugs to forget!”
I’m not sure that seeing a 54-year old on ecstasy is any worse than seeing a 54-year old on a £3000 bike or in a swimming pool.

Seeing a 54-year old on ecstasy is just sad. Johnny Depp is 53, fyi. So why does the author’s image of a 54 year old is necessarily of some overweight balding douche whose only “fun” is to get high at a club? There’s so much more to life. It really looks like the author is straight up hating to see his own ageing reflection in the mirror and tries to mask his personal insecurities with awkward self-dissing humor, drugs, alcohol, etc.

In a related vein, I suppose, you should resist the urge to share. An arch comment on Twitter is fine. Your son’s 15-year-old friends finding a Facebook picture of dad clubbing in a state of possibly artificial excitement really isn’t.

He obviously realizes how ridiculous it all looks from a viewer’s perspective.

I don’t want to be the dull healthy uncle who lived to 100, I want to be the lovable rogue who lived to 85, drank a bit too much and charmed the ladies.

LOL that uncle who drinks too much, “charms” the ladies and does coke on the weekends is anything but lovable. It’s more of a burden to the family, if anything. So please, quit fetishizing this lifestyle, because it ain’t cute.

There is one thing though. One ironclad no-no. One thing you should never do as you party into your 50s. Don’t be cool about drugs with your kids. […] So, fine, take a bit of coke at that dinner party if you have to. But the next day, tell your teenage kids that you drank too much and that it bought on the cold you’d been fighting and that’s why you’re sniffling. […] They’ll know you’re lying – and what’s more, they’ll be thanking God that you have the decency to do so.

Oh, the voice of wisdom! I just puked in my mouth. These kids will grow up convinced that their dad was a total idiot. As an alternative, they might also become drug addicts, because they had a great example growing up. It’s basically a junkie attempting to give parenting advice.

I can’t imagine an authentically happy man who’s madly in love with his wife and kids say, “Yo! This weekend, I want to drink and do drugs and go out to party with my boys!” There is so much more to life than getting drunk and high at a club. You can travel, experience different cultures and cuisines, help people, master a sport or a musical instrument, learn new languages… And to think that people still pick drugs and alcohol as a way to entertain themselves, wow!

All I can say is – these people, just like the author of the aforementioned article, are full of self-hatred. They hate what they’ve become and need to escape from themselves. Learning a new language won’t do the trick, they need something stronger. Something that will make them forget who they are. Wrong life choices lead to a downward spiral, where they begin to think that it’s too late to fix anything and turn to drugs and alcohol as a means to forget.

Happiness and clubs are two mutually exclusive concepts. You can’t be happy AND have a need to party regularly. Happy people are high on life and definitely don’t need any stimulants to enjoy themselves.

To anyone who still thinks that clubs, alcohol and drugs are “cool,” whether you’re 19 or 55, I suggest a long session of introspection sprinkled with a handful of rational thinking.

Irina Tee

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